My Ecosystem
“I make fresh meals and hot chapaties for my family every single day”, says a proud working woman.
Fantastic! It surely is an indulgence most of us enjoy but is it making you bend back to the extent of giving you a backache (metaphorically)- is the question you need to answer for yourself.
Obsessing over becoming a ‘Super Woman’ who can handle countless things all by herself is a mirage many women aspire to achieve. This pride is often over-rated and may curb you of your true potential. You can tweak your environment in a way that augments your efforts and strengthens you to pursue your goals rather than having this “I can do it all” approach. Besides expecting the corporate sector to get more conducive and accepting to empowering the women at work, women at their own level have to help the cause. Creating an ecosystem that supports you and stands by you can take care of many of those side things that come in the way of your aspirations. Mutually supportive spouse, as always, tops the list of must-haves to make a successful career for either partner. I can’t think of alternatives to that (other than quitting one of the two!) so I’ll take that for granted.
Be it gadgets or manpower that can make life easier for you, buy/hire things that you can afford, don’t always look at saving and cost effectiveness. Certain things have a hidden and long term ROI. A fitness programme may sound expensive but is definitely cheaper than all the money you may end up spending taking it off from work or consulting doctors if you are unfit. Hiring help for your household chores, changing diapers or any other mundane work will cost you money but might reward you with some rest or quality time with your family besides generating employment for another person! Don’t always be the first one to run to the kitchen to get that missing spoon on the table. Let others volunteer too, for it’ll help them become independent while you enjoy your meal. Remember, people by nature like to help others. Exploit this human trait unapologetically, remembering to reciprocate when it’s your turn. When you ask a friend to pick up your son from school you can specially bake that chocolate cake on the weekend her children enjoy so much. It’s amazing to see how your parents pitch in so willingly to help you, of course it’s your moral responsibility to reciprocate with your generous acknowledgement, love and whatever else it requires. Maintaining best relations with people who do not empathize with you may not be your cup of tea, give up any guilt.
Despite all this, there is a price one has to pay. A career often comes at the price of some missing out on those leisure coffee mornings, receiving your children back from school, being there for them at that exact moment when they just wanted to howl about a fight with a friend or let their frustration out, spending time with your parents, frequent shopping trips, impromptu outings with friends, reading, painting or simply relaxing, all these and many other like these. Just as a stay at home mom craves for that financial independence and personal growth, a sense of achievement and public acknowledgement for her hard work and much more.
Some things in life would always get missed out. It’s all about one’s priorities and acceptance.
Written by Chitra Goyal, Editorial team
